New Year's eve 2009

Today is a day full of activities. Some enjoyable, some that just have to be done. As I sit here early in the morning thinking about everything that needs to get done today, I can't help but to wonder why I really have no reflections about the year. There were some good times, and bad times, but most of all....I feel like it's just time to move on. I don't want to dwell on what happened last year, I want to focus on what I'm going to do this coming year.

I woke up early this morning, not because I was anxious about today, but because I had to retrieve some blood of the elders from the game Vampire Wars on Facebook. I know that sounds stupid, but hey if it gets me out of bed, and helps me start the day, I'm all for it!!! I went out in the kitchen and played my game for awhile, checked e-mail, wished everyone a very happy new year, and then I was done. What I mean by done, is that there was no stress on having to get things together for today, what was I going to wear for tonight. As Cesar Millan would say...I was in a calm submissive state. It was kind of nice.

Tonight Jim and I are going to go see Xanadu at the community center. Jim won free tickets by being the 1000th friend of Pat and Tom on KNCI on Facebook. I am so excited. I so love the arts and things like music circus, operas, etc. I have never really been to anything like this. Not to mention it's time together just Jim and myself. Now don't get me wrong....my first thought was after the play where are we going from there, maybe to a bar to have our first public new year's kiss. Then my head goes into...I wonder if Spencer would like to join us for some music and festivities after the show. I am always thinking of others before my hubby. That has got to stop!! Jim has stood by me through thick and thin and it's time I show him that.

I sometimes get upset with Jim because I feel like I'm taken for granted, but it just dawned on me, that I do the same to him. So this year, I'm focusing on us. I'm not making an resolutions...they just don't stick, besides this is a new year and a new opportunity. Mom has a car now, so I don't have to be their taxi. I'm getting back to me and Jim and Shadow. Home is where the heart is...and they are truly my heart and soul. So sorry friends and family, but mending is around the corner for my heart.

And we're off.....
Jim and I left the house around 10am to go pick up the tickets for the show tonight. We had to take the long way there because we were still on the spare tire. But we got there and got the tickets. Jim noticed that where we were sitting was in the orchestra pit. Oh how fun!!!! After that we headed over to mom's house. We sat around for awhile, then since mom had to go to the bank, I thought this would be a perfect time to try out her car before I have to drive it to the doctors office. So we all piled in the car and off we went.

The car is not that bad, it has a few issues but hey.....it runs!!!! I have to figure out a way so mom can sit up straighter in the seat. The seat leans waaaaay back....I felt almost like I was laying down in the back seat driving. lol. The car has a lot of get up and go, so let's hope that mom will finally be able to get up and go!!!!

Anyway, we came back home to mom's. Jim had to leave to pick up his paycheck, get a new tire for the van, and then meet up with mom, Kelly and I for lunch. That is where the day went wonky!!

I took mom to the eye doctor. When we got there we saw a lady that used to come to the brown bag program that mom runs at church. Her name is Barbara. She looked great. Barbara has some medical issues like diabetes and such, but she looked really healthy. That was nice to see. We talked for awhile, but I had to get mom in for her appointment. They took mom right away.

Now her appointment was to get her eyes checked so she could get some new glasses. I was thinking maybe half an hour or so. Half an hour came and went, still no mom. Forty-five minutes, still no mom. Hmmmm. Kelly is getting restless, and we both are getting hungry!!! Jim shows up and an hour later, mom re-appears from the land of the blind. We thought that we were done....should have known. The doctor dilated mom's eyes and wanted her to see the surgeon about doing surgery to get rid of her cataract. So that was going to be another half hour or longer wait. Which is fine, because she needs to have this done. But I was getting hungry!!! Jim and I only had a bowl of cereal at 8am and here it is almost 4pm!!! But we wait.

Once again, mom re-appears from the grasp of the doctor, and she has this sick look on her face. I ask her what's wrong. She has to have surgery and the doctor is going to fix both eyes, a month apart. Then she shows me the appointment schedule. Wholly cow....she has about 8 appointments before her surgery on March 9th!!!! Then after March, they are going to do surgery on the other eye for her far sightedness in April!!! Looks like I'm still a taxi driver for another 6 months or so. That's ok, I would rather mom get her eyes fixed than to put this off any longer. *sigh*

Moving on.....we head over to where we are going to have lunch, which has now turned into dinner. We get over to Panda Buffet and they are closed!!! They close between lunch and dinner to get reset I guess. So I took mom and Kelly across the street to the store so they could get some groceries for later and then we headed back to eat.

Now it's 4:30pm. Jim and I have to be able to eat, take mom and Kelly home, get us home and changed and out the door by 7pm to go see Xanadu by 8pm downtown. To give you a breakdown of time, mom lives 30 minutes away from the restaurant, we live 45 minutes away from mom (with no traffic), and we live 20 minutes away from the theater downtown but then have to find parking. Whew!!!!

The funniest part of the whole eating thing is that mom's eyes are still dilated. She can't see a thing!!!! Her nose is shot so she can't smell anything...so if I catch her licking things to find out what they are, I'm leaving....LOL. I helped mom figure out what everything was and we finally got to eat. RELIEF!!!! The food tasted soooo good. I had to catch myself and slow down otherwise I was going to either loose my dinner or it was going to get stuck and I was going to be super uncomfortable for a long time. Since we got there right when it opened, not all of the food was out yet. By the time all the food was out, I had eaten my cup of food and was done. No matter though, it all tasted good. I was good too though. I didn't eat anything fried, I did however eat the filling out of the crab rangoon!!! Yummmm!!! I had my fill of protein, veggies, jello (oh I so love jello!!!), and yes I had some ice milk.

Now it's time to break the sound barrier getting mom and Kelly home. We got them home and unpacked then we were off. Thankfully we knew what we were going to wear to the theater tonight. Like super hero's, we changed in an instant and we were off and driving again.

Are you tired yet?!? We were but our night was just beginning!!! We parked in a parking garage and walked over to the community center. We had no idea where they were holding the play. In the front of the center was a clean and sober group, I don't think we need that, and on the side of the center was a recovery art show. Hmmm...I see a theme!! lol. Behind the community center was the theater. Yeah!!!!! We have finally arrived!!! As we walked in, there was someone selling these books. I thought that they were programs at first, since this is my first Broadway production that I've been to!!! Nope, these were books about the whole life of Xanadu. I thought, cool, I've never seen the movie, and it would be a cool item to remember tonight by. $25 dollars later.....it was still cool!!! Jim headed over to grab a beer.....$5.50!!! It was Budweiser too!!! Who cares, tonight is our night. I was going to buy a water but not at $3 for a 16.9 ounce bottle. We had about a half an hour until we could go into the seating area. So we sat back and watched all the people arrive. There were people in furs and people in jeans and hoodies. It was interesting to see what everyone was wearing. I was afraid that me in my black pants and t-shirt were going to be out of place. Nope!!!! lol.

7:30pm we are ushered into the seating area. An usher takes us to our seats. WOW!!!!! We are three rows back from the stage!!!! Woot woot!!! We take our seats and look through our program....not the book, but the actual program. The seats are filling in around us, but so far no one is sitting on either side of us. I was worried because I didn't really fit in the seat. There is nothing worse than having to sit next to a heavy person and have them "hang over" your seat too. So far so good. I was amazed at the lights, and the settings, it was all just so exciting. There were seats up on stage that people were sitting in too! I'm not sure I would want to sit there. Then it happened, the seats next to me filled up. Thankfully she was a skinny little thing and I was able to sit closer to Jim (who had no one sitting next to him), so we all had room. She would occasionally kick me or elbow me but that was ok.

The theater darkens....it's beginning.....the show is on!!!!!!

It was fantastic!!! The lead singer actually occasionally sounded like Olivia Newton John! The humor was hilarious, and the singing and dancing was absolutely amazing!!! I LOVED IT!!!!! I'm hooked!!! We left the theater and were going to head over to a bar to finish out our evening, but everywhere was packed!!!! Neither one of us wanted to really drink anyway. So we headed home. I was tired but amped too. This was a fantastic evening!!!

Finally home and stripped down to our comfy clothes, we relaxed. We watched some tv, played with the dog, and by 11:30pm I was asleep. So much for my New Year's day kiss....but not so. I felt Jim lean over and give me a kiss on the cheek at midnight. Now you know why I keep him around.

The evening was over. What a wonderful way to close out the year. Happy New Year everyone. May all your wishes, dreams, and desires be obtainable, and fulfilled.

Good night.

Maybe 2010 is going to be better

*Fingers crossed*

2009 was a trying time for us. Not any more than any other year, but since it's still salt in the wound, it feels worse than it is. I hope.

Jim had an early day today from work. He was home by 11am!!!! We were hoping that his paycheck would be here today but we have to wait until tomorrow around 1pm. Now the reason this is soooo important right now is that we overdrew our account Dec. 24th!!!! We have to get a new tire for the van, I have to take my mom to see the eye doctor tomorrow around 1:30pm (she lives a good 45 min. away from me and the doctor is a good 30 minutes away from her!!).

Jim and I were going to take mom and Kelly out for a fun New Year's eve day...but....man there seems to be a lot of buts in my life recently....time is going to be an issue. Just as I was starting to stress about how everything was going to get done, Jim called.

Jim asked me to go to his Facebook page and see if KNCI (radio station) posted something on his page about being the 1000th friend on Facebook. Well sure enough there was!!! Jim won a pair of tickets to go see Xanadu tomorrow night!!!

This will be the first New Year's eve that we have spent out together, not at home dosing on and off. This will be our first New Year's kiss out in public in the 13 years we've been married!!!

As for the paycheck and the tire, we have worked out a plan to make sure everything gets done and we can still have some fun before we have to take my mom and sister home. Then it's out to play for Jim and myself.

So here is to new excitement for all of you and the New Year!!

A very Merry Christmas

We wish you a merry christmas, we wish you a merry christmas, we wish you a merry christmas and a happy new year!!!

These photos are actually from Christmas eve at mom's house but it's close enough!! Jim and I headed over to mom's house around 11am. We had the van stuffed with gifts (ok not so many of those but the heart was there), and food. I did my usual annoying phone call at 7am to wish them a merry christmas, so now it was time to pay the piper and spend some time with them. lol. We had decided not to make a big to do out of Christmas this year. None of us had the money or the time and besides, it's time to get back to the meaning of Christmas not the material of it. Yeah I know, sounds good in theory, but I really do mean it, just have a hard time doing it.

We got to mom's house and first thing we see is mom and Kelly bounding toward us with arms wide open. Kind of a nice thing....but I'll never admit to it. lol. Jim and I unloaded the food and we all sat down in the front room to open the gifts that we weren't giving to each other.

Now my poor mom has the hardest time getting stuff for me because I ALWAYS know what it is I'm getting. But I am thankful just the same.

This photo is of a oil diffuser for the house. It's apple and cinnamon scented. Yumm....it's really pretty too. I know juuuust where I'm going to put it.

Here is my mom and sister, Kelly, checking out their cool new coffee cups from Jim and I. Hee hee hee. All together, we got mom a coffee cup, pair of earrings, and something else I can't think of right now. For Kelly we got her a coffee cup, ring, and something else I also can't think of. Honest, I haven't even had any egg nog!!!

This is another gift that mom and Kelly got me. It's a our daily bread dish with a box of banana bread mix. The funny thing is that I didn't know she was getting this for me while we were at the store, until she forgot to buy it. So I gave her some money to go buy it, and she said well it was for you... So she had a chance to get one over on me and blew it. lol.

And of course what is Christmas if you don't have a few stupid photos of the family. Here is Jim and mine. Ok, nothing in my nose, nothing in my teeth....CHEESE!!! The bow is off my banana bread box. I thought that I needed some color.

Then our annual mom and daughter goof off shot. I was trying to be a sumo wrestler but look more like a mutant crab. Mom stepped in with her sumo try but she just looks constipated. lol.

No comment needed here!!!! It's the feast!!! We had a TON of food!!! In fact I think mom is going to have food for a month!!! We decided that we were not taking any food home with us. I know this really breaks my mom and sister's hearts!!! NOT!!!!

We stayed until about 6pm at mom's. Mom's neighbor Colleen and her son Shawn came over to feast with us. All in all it was a nice day. We were all tired and ready to go home. But before we could go home, we had to slip in a gift we bought for mom and Kelly. We played it off as it came from Santa. So as we were getting ready to leave, Jim stepped outside like he was going to go smoke a cigarette and grabbed the gift. Mom was in the rest room and I had Kelly blocked at the kitchen table eating so she couldn't see. Jim snuck it under their tree and we were off.

We came home to a very happy and excited puppy. We were gone all day and I came back with wrapped gifts from mom and Kelly. And yes, they were all for her!!!! She enjoyed her toy and chicken strips and then it was time for bed. Finally.....

Oh I almost forgot...a little bit after we got home, a friend of ours stopped by to give us some Christmas gifts. Jim got a bottle of Jameson and two drinking glasses and he got me a bottle of Jack Black Dead Red Root Beer and a bottle of Brain Wash. Unfortunately, I was so tired that I fell asleep before I could thank him.

Christmas morning....

We got up and Jim headed for the coffee, Shadow toward the back door and me toward the kitchen. Oddly enough....Santa had stopped by and left a gift for Jim...ok it was me but he knew that when he saw it.

But the best part of the day was when my good friend Spencer stopped by the house. I have never had anyone in my home for a good 9 years because of my hoarding. Well I worked all month to get it clean so Spencer could stop by. When he came over he could sit on the couch and we all had a nice visit. Shadow even left him alone...sort of....she growled a couple of times but that was it. That was fantastic for her!!!!

Spencer made me a felted ornament that was so cool!!! He couldn't stay long but the time we spent together was very well worth it.

As for the rest of the day, Jim and I spent it lounging around. We had a fantastic Christmas. I couldn't have wished for anything better!!!

The day before Christmas eve

It's the day before Christmas eve and all through the kitchen not a thing was finished not even the bitchen.

I had promised mom that I would make a bunch of finger foods to take over to her house for Christmas eve so she didn't have to cook a big meal. Especially since I can't eat very much.

So the menu that I was planning was: lemon bars, ham and pineapple cream cheese wraps, mahogany chicken, mini pizzas, bacon cheese burger bites, potato skins, baked cinnamon apples, and taco cups. Now out of all of these, I can only eat the bacon cheese burger bites, apples, chicken, taco cups, and.....lemon bars.....ok well I'm not supposed to eat those....but......yep it's going to my butt....I can't let them go to waste or should I say...waist. LOL Sorry I think I'm a little punch drunk from....well I'm not sure but it's got me goofy!!

I make the lemon bars first since they are a breeze to make. Oh the smell was fantastic!!!! *drools uncontrollably!!* They turn out pretty good. But that is where the fun ends.

AAARRRGGGG!!!!! Next I went to make my bacon cheese burger bites. Now these are super easy to make, they are hamburger, cheese, crumbled bacon, and Egg Beaters. Mix them all together and scoop them into mini muffin pans. Well this is all well and good but with everything going on, I forgot to spray the pan with Pam!!!! Yep, you guessed it!!! They stuck like there was no tomorrow. I didn't want to scratch my non stick pan so I, for what seemed like forever, gently, pleaded and wiggled them out. I have to admit there were a few choice words in there off and on....but no need to go into detail...lol.

Next on the list was the taco cups. These too are very easy to make....or so I thought they were going to be. I mixed up the hamburger with the taco seasoning, pressed it into the muffin pans, mixed the sour cream, cheese, and olives together and dolloped it on top. Just pop them in the oven and cook for about 10 minutes. WRONG!!!! I apparently used 80/20 hamburger rather than the 10% I thought I grabbed. Well the muffin pans filled up with grease that I had to dump out. While dumping it out....I almost lost the sour cream mixture. I was able to save them, and they tasted fantastic.....but they didn't look so fantastic.

By this time, I am almost ready to give up. I don't like it when my cooking goes array. But I charged forward. Thankfully everything else went fairly well. But what is there to screw up with the rest of the menu!

My cooking finally evened out and I was fairly pleased but I just have to be thankful that it was a family affair and not company. LOL.

I guess now it's time for me to put on my cap for a long winters nap. Until then....

Feeling Christmas

Just recently I read a post by a friend of mine that said, "If you don't feel Christmas in your heart, you'll never find it under the tree".

This got me thinking. I feel Christmas in my heart but I also feel it in my pocket book, and my stomach. Granted the pocket book and stomach are coping methods but it's the feeling in my heart that triggers those feelings elsewhere.

This year we were not going to give any gifts to anyone due to financial reasons. But the closer Christmas got, I couldn't take it anymore. I had to have a little something for everyone. It started out with a battery charger for my hubby Jim. This was important for me because he supports me through everything and is ALWAYS there for me in the good times and the bad. Not to mention that he has given up working on his motorcycle because we needed money for other things. So this year, he had to come first!!!

Then I saw a generic Wii and thought that would be perfect for my mom and sister. The game would give them something else to do rather than arguing with each other. Then I thought about Spencer. A dear friend that is working and going to school at the same time. He works so hard. I found a neck massager to help ease his stress. It wasn't until I brought it home that Jim told me that he thought it is to fru fru for a guy. Ok so it's soft blue and fuzzy, but hey what do I know.

And of course I can't forget my best friend and her family. Wendy is losing her father due to illness this Christmas so they weren't going to do anything for the holidays. I had to be able to send her some love, along with her kids this year too.

It wasn't a lot this year but I couldn't not give something to my loved ones. I found that I ate more trying not to buy items for everyone, than I did when I bought the stuff. But then of course, my head tells me that what I got isn't enough, then I start eating to curb the inadequacy I am feeling. The stupid part is that the things I bought were from the heart, so there should be no sense of inadequacy. But that is a demon I still have to battle.

I did decorate a little bit around the house to make it feel like the holidays, but it was never really the same.

So this year, I guess I'm faking it until I feel it. Hopefully I won't feel it in my belly before my heart.